breeamal

The new year has just started and already wonderful things are happening.  I just got back from a a wonderful weekend in Lily Dale  with my friend Heather.  The trip was my Christmas present from her, and her first time there.   The air was crisp but not too cold or snowy.  My main reason for this trip was to hear the Sunday service at the Church of the Living Spirit again.  Since my last visit I have been invited to give the Sunday sermon April 6th, and I realized that the last time I attended I was so focused on my afternoon lecture I have no memory of the service at all.  So I figured I needed a refresher. Mission accomplished we spent a few hours chatting with the lovely Cara Seekings and I received an exciting invitation for Super Seekrit Summer Project the week of my July workshop.
 
This Month I will be spending my birthday in beautiful Buffalo, NY at the huge Psychic Fair at the  Hearthstone Manor in Depew.  This will be my largest fair as a psychic reader.  I'm very excited and very nervous.  I will also be giving a free lecture at the fair, previewing my new workshop: Walking the Sacred Circle - an Introduction to Ritual.

Something I've been dreading for years has finally happened - I dropped a bottle of essential oil... and it smashed.

Thanks be to any gods who happen to be listening it was only a small bottle of Lavender and Mint Muscle rub I was beta testing and not a big bottle of camphor or Ylang Ylang or Carrot seed oil.  I do have an emergency plan if that ever happens - burn down the house.

How do you ask a man to be the last to die for a mistake?

It's a question that's been bandied about a lot recently.  Politicians and pundits sit in comfortable chairs and, with dour faces and great gravity, ask, "How do you ask a man to be the last to die for a mistake?"

They ask it as if it was a reason to continue ahead - to put off the admission of a mistake.  As is it is better to surge forward and keep digging rather than admit there was a mistake and one person will be the last to die because of it.

Is it easier to be the first to die for a mistake, or the second, or the fourth, or the four hundredth? 

I would imagine being the second would be easiest.  The second person to die from a mistake, most likely, would not know he was dying for a mistake.  He would believe in the cause, without the added pressure of being the first.  Those first brave soldiers, marching off to war, believing they die for a just cause.  It would seem easier to die knowing you are defending those you love, your family and friends back home.  You die so that they can live.

It would get harder as doubt starts to leak into your mind.  Years may have passed and now you are fighting less for the people back home and more for the people around you.  You fight for your buddies, your fellow soldiers, men and women you have spent more time with than with your wife or husband.  "Home" isn't even real anymore.  Home is where your head is and your head is at war.

How do you ask this man to die for a mistake - the man who knows he is dying for a mistake, even if that knowledge is just a faint glimmer of doubt?  Will he die knowing not that he dies to protect those he loves, but that someone he loves will be next.  The soldier standing next to him, someone he has spent nearly every minute with for weeks and months on end, may die minutes after he does.  Does he fall knowing he will not be the last to die for a mistake?

How do you ask a man to be the hundredth to the last to die for a mistake?  How do you ask him to be the second to last to die for a mistake?  Would he resist?  Would he rather be the last to die?

How would I feel to be the last man to die for a mistake?

Relief.  I would feel relief that no one else would die.  Relief that my buddies were safe.  Relief that I was able to keep the man next to me from dying.

If I were asked to be the last man to die for a mistake I would accept the charge and feel relief.

X-Posted to American Metaphysics

I know this will put the damper on some people's plans, but I don’t care.  It has been such a dry summer, the grass is brown, the flowers are drooping, even the weeds are dying (except for those little bastards hiding among my flowers, lovin the hose and shooting up over night). 

I hate watering the garden, and do it as little as possible.  Unless you have the time and money for a solid irrigation system, soaking the soil 8-10 inches down, all you are doing is stunting the roots and encouraging your plats to be hose dependant.  I still water the flowers by the house and carry the watering can out to the lettuce bed.  Mostly I leave the veggie garden along.  It's planted in the lowest point in the yard and rarely requires watering.  When I was trying to decide where to plant my vegetables I walked around the yard, looking for where the grass grew the fastest.  There I tilled up a big circle and started planting – it’s been getting bigger every year.

The only flowers I don't water are the sunflowers… because I'm lazy.  They are too far for the hose and too profuse for the watering can.  I wanted to make a bold statement, so I planted over 125 feet of sunflowers all along the road.

The thunder is still distant, but I can't wait for the storm to hit.  Some might complain, but what could be more stunning than lightning on the fourth.

The only fireworks display I really remember from my early childhood was during a rainstorm.  The lightning flashed behind the fireworks and the thunder was almost as loud.  We were crouched in the car, but we had the windows open so we could see out.  Mom had brought old cookie sheets so we could make a little awning over the open windows to keep the rain out.  It was the most fun I ever had on the fourth.  I hope this year is as good.

X posted to American Metaphysics

It's been one hell of a few months. I ended up loosing a freelance gig that I was counting for the summer and totally fell apart for a few weeks. After lots of crying and laying on the bathroom floor I decided to start a regular job hunt... I forgot just how depressing those can be.

The job hunt has gone very poorly, but my other work has been picking up, so I don't know where to focus my energies and it all has left me so exhausted I can barely move some days.

So that's some of what's going on.

There have been some very positive, nay remarkable opportunities showing up lately too. I will be teaching classes on Auras in two locations next week, LilyDale, NY and Fowler, OH

I also have a new yoga class that will be starting in Late June at the Peace House in Youngstown, OH

The Lily Dale class is a remarkable opportunity. Lily Dale is the oldest spiritualist community in the US. Being asked to speak there, is very cool and has highlighted exactly what kind of people are in the local metaphysical community around here. Lots of the psychic around here brag about spending time at Lily Dale or they talk about how many classes they have been to there. Psychics trained in Lily Dale are treated extra specially, I don't know of a single local who as been asked to teach there. Man, some of these people are Pissed. The incredulous "You?" or "How?" has been bandied about. Worse things when they think I'm not in hearing range (The smart people remember that as 20-50 years younger that most of the psychics in the area I hear better than most and they leave the room before talking about me).

On the one hand, FUCK EM. It's not my fault they suck. On the other, none of the local psychic fairs will have me as a reader. None. I have to drive 1.5 hours or more to find a fair that will have me as a psychic and that's making it really hard to grow a practice in the area.

Ok, this post has gone on longer that I planned, I have to go get some work done. I have a bunch of little notices that I keep meaning to post about other stuff I've been doing and I get those up later today.

Got the following email today about one of my Blue Dragon Beauty Products. My first thought was that it was SPAM, it came from a Yahoo mail account. But it looks like it may be legit. I wrote back that I'll take action when I get an actual cease and desist letter. This could be from anyone.


Blue Dragon Beauty

Date: 02/12/2007


This is a courtesy letter from the trademark owners of LOVE POTION® and
LOVE
POTION #9® for the classification which includes Fragrances, Oils & Incense,
Candles, Bath and Body Products, etc. You are currently listing a product for
sale in violation of our U.S. Registered Trademarks. Kindly remove or rename
your infringing items within the next 7 days or we will be forced to turn this
matter over to our legal department.
Please inform your retailers that they must also comply with this notice.


Thank you for your immediate attention to this matter.
Please Reply to:
donerickson@adelphia.net

T. Taylor

LovePotionPerfume.com

Love Potion® Fragrances

REF Registered US Trademarks: 1902312,2703689
REF Blue Obsidian Crystal Glow Massage Oil
Love Potion #1

Don't be flakey. Get Yahoo! Mail for Mobile and
always stay connected to friends.

I read you every day and never post a word. Why?

As fewer and fewer of my old friends post I link about why I pass this place very day without comment and the sad truth comes home. Guilt. I feel guilty for any bit of writing that doesn't feed a purpose - work, classes, whatever.

It seems wrong to put something I enjoy in such a narrow box. Should I only write what feeds an image I try to create? Should I devote all my words to a product I try to sell? Should I create only for utility and never for joy?

I stopped posting a few years ago when I decided I didn't want to be a misery blog. My life sucks, I want to die, boo hoo hoo. For a bit I had nothing else to say. So I said nothing.

I got out of the habit, I suppose. I lost the pattern and focused on other things and nothing. Boo hoo hoo I suppose, but nonetheless....

This week has me chained to my desk, writing on Chakras and panicking.

I miss you.

I promise I'll write soon....

I never post. I'm a looser. Yadda, Yadda, Yadda.

So, on the flight back from Texas a few weeks ago Mom read some article about internet marketing, hits and conversion.

She learned a new word: conversion.

Oh God I want to DIE!

This has lead to long conversations over dinner (I have to eat with them, It's my only chance for real food) about my conversion rates for Blue Dragon Beauty. Thing is, I don't really know if my conversion sucks ass or not, I just know my sales aren't that great... but as my enablers... er... FRIENDS keep telling me, all new business take time - like 3-5 years. I'll be old then.

So, anyway, this got me thinking about what I like in webpages vs what the marketing majors have been creating and what I like is text. Big blocks of text are intrinsically interesting to me. New stuff to read and learn. Apparently the rest of the universe wants more pictures and links and flashing stuff. What the fuck do I know?

So, to that end, I've been working with a new shopping cart program I feel so very stupid. My easy shopping cart is confusing the hell out of me, but I am learning... I'm learning that all I was is a techie to trade blow-jobs for technical work. Urg, I'd rather spend the rest of my life on my knees than stare at another line of code (tears streaming down my face) wondering what the hell all this means.

Any techie volunteers?